Fucking Lousy Pituitary Gland

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03:30 – Edinburgh, Scotland

A couple of hours ago, while I was drifting in and out of sleep I had a dream about my ex. I was holding her and telling her I loved her. Her body was wasted and gaunt. There were hollows around her bones. She was so thin she looked like she was starving to death.

I can’t stop thinking about that dream. It was so horrible.
I miss her. I feel like I should have taken better care of her.

It’s so much easier to love people when you don’t have to deal with their shit on a daily basis.

 
Ah.
Lovely lovely insomnia.
It’s been hitting me this week. Ever since the flight from America.

I’ve been going to a lot of late night Fringe Festival shows, so my body is all like “we’re staying up late and having fun”. Except now I just want to catch up on my sleep. No dice.
“Wake up mother fucker” yells my pituitary gland.

 
Fucking Vulgar Australians.

Last night I took in my new favourite Edinburgh Fringe show: “The Dirty Cabaret” (see photo at top).

A lot of the audience were genuinely offended I think.
A lot of people seem to come to this festival to watch nice comfortable dinner time television type comedy.

The dirty Cabaret features strip tease with used condoms as titty tassles, and a woman tearing out her own uterous and using it as a ventriliquist puppet.
I thought it was fucking hilarious.

The cashmere-sweater-wearing-hipsters in the audience seemed most upset by it. I guess that’s a win.
Upsetting sweater wearers is a creative goal I aspire to myself.

Of course the Dirty Cabaret is an Australian show. Represent!
It’s nice to know we Australians still have a talent for offending the denizens of the British Isles.

 
Hanging with randoms.

This afternoon I hung out with some new friends I met using the ‘Hangouts’ feature on the Couch Surfing app.

If you haven’t tried it yet, this app is def worth a go.
Couch surfers are some of the few types of people you can contact out of the blue, and say “hey let’s go do something in half an hour” and they’ll be like “yeah! Let’s do it!”
It’s a great app for meeting randoms when you’re in strange cities.

 
Go. To. Sleep…

I’m so fucking tired. Eyes still popping out of my head.

Do you think I could I use my pituitary gland as a puppet?

 
Coming soon:

What I am doing in Scotland; how I’ve been able to fly halfway around the world in the last 2 months without going broke; and why you will be seeing me drink a whole lot of beer in the next couple of months…
Finally, my secret mission revealed!

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Spaced Out & LOLing in Edinburgh, Scotland.
New Mission Objective: Hitchhike To India.